Let’s just hope that Fox News has a blood disorder and bleeds out on the floor.

“I think defeating Fox — and more importantly, getting the rest of the media to understand they do not do legitimate news — is very important… I hope to do that through pointing out their hypocrisy, propaganda and general foolishness. But I also plan to beat them in the ratings and make them fear me.” Cenk Uygur

Okay so IBM has invested millions of dollars and thousands of hours to create a machine to play jeopardy. His name is Watson and even if he goes on the longest champion run in Jeopardy history it’ll still take years to make back the money invested.

All this being said I would rather have seen the money go to SNL writers to continue their Celebrity Jeopardy skits. God knows those skits are the most entertaining thing about Jeopardy, right?

BUCK FUTTER!!!!

I think it would be so great to go “Back to the Past” with one of these NES Game USB drives and blow my own 8 year old mind. I remember when 3 1/2 floppies became popular with 1.4 mb of space this would be as great as pulling a rabbit out of thimble.

Alright so you’re alone on Valentines Day. I know it’s rough and we both know you’re ego can’t handle another candle light dinner in front of your blow up doll, right?. Well if you’re like me, you’re a family guy and you want to spend these Great, Completely Legitimate holidays with family.

Well since we know the odds of getting married and having a kid before Valentines Day are a gazillion to 1 and it’s too much of a hassle to rescue/adopt a starving kid from a 3rd world country we can look forward to buying a robo baby. Yes those Japanese Scientists are at it again. Now we can substitute genuine love and affection with microchips and electrodes just by swiping our credit cards. Yay!!!

And who knows maybe your lifeless, soulless, barely passable excuse for child will garner some pity from a hottie.